A Springtime Experience in My Life

Roger Lynn is an experiential mystic – lover of life – photographer – flute player – poet – hiker – hot spring soaker – expresser of gratitude – blessed beyond the capacity of words to express. He currently lives in Boulder, CO.

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It seems that I am having what might be called a springtime experience in my life. After a long winter my heart is thawing and my soul is waking up. It’s not any one particular thing that I notice, but rather all of the various pieces of my life falling into place in a new and more holistic way. I keep trying to find a good way to describe what it feels like, but so far my words seem to fall short (and yet, as is my pattern, I keep trying to find the words anyway). I’m not even sure I can point to a “why.” Maybe it was just time. But whatever the reason, something powerful is happening inside of me. I feel more grounded in who I am, and more comfortable in my own skin. There is a new (and unfamiliar) confidence in my own value and worth. On my morning walk today I had the odd awareness that I actually like myself. It’s not that any of this is completely foreign territory for me – personal growth is something of a spiral. But on this particular turning of the wheel (to mix metaphors for a moment) it feels both deeper and higher, to say nothing of more expansive. There are a great many areas of my life which are filled with as yet unanswered questions (aren’t there always?), but for the most part I find myself content to simply live with the uncertainty and trust that the Universe continues to have my best interests at heart. Rilke’s quote about “living the questions now” comes to mind. It is uncharted territory in which I find myself, with vast and amazing vistas opening up before me. I have no idea how this will all play out, but in this moment I am enjoying the unfolding. I occasionally have a fleeting wish that I had gotten here sooner, but such thoughts don’t usually last long. I got here when I got here, and could not have arrived before now because it took everything that has gone before to prepare me for this. So, in this present NOW I choose to stand with arms and heart wide open, a smile on my face, and a song on my lips, gratefully ready to receive whatever gifts this life has to share. To quote the Dalai Lama, “Every day, think as you wake up, ‘Today I’m fortunate to have woken up. I am alive. I have a precious human life. And I’m not going to waste it.’ ” And to quote my own email tag line, “Keeping my feet firmly planted in the flow!” I wonder where the flow will take me next. I think I’m about to find out.



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